Nancy L. Barlow

Mom passed away Sunday morning around 7:00am. It was following a long and exhausting weekend, mostly for Dad and Todd. They called us around 9:00pm on Saturday Evening because Mom was coherent again and was telling Dad she needed to get up and go. Dad didn't understand what she meant so they tried to sit her up to move her into the Living Room but once they got her to the edge of the bed she was gone again. She just kept saying she "needed to go". I think it was her Spirit trying to figure out how to go and what to do. Dad called us and we all ran over. Once all were there we knelt around her bed and Todd offered an unbelieveable prayer calling upon the Lord to send his Angels to come and get her to take her home. He also asked that if it was possible that it be her Mom and Dad that came to get her. It was an amazing experience that I will always treasure to be able to be in that room. At that point we all left her alone and it wasn't until everyone was gone and all was still and quiet that she left us to return home. It was finally over. I know that sounds strange to say finally but it really has been a rough couple of weeks for everyone, including Mom and she was ready to go. I love her and will always to be greatful to her for always excepting me and loving me as one of her own children, For giving me my husband and raising him to be the incredible man he is, for being an example of what a righteous woman on earth is like and what she does, for being a hard worker and a loving Grandmother to my children. I will desperately miss and love her always and I look forward to the day we will meet again.

Here is a copy of her obituary:

Layton-Nancy Lee Young Barlow, 66, quietly passed away on May 25, 2008 after a courageous battle with cancer. Nancy was born on December 21, 1941 to Leon D. and Ortel Bingham Young. She was the oldest of three children. She married Ronald Haven Barlow in the Salt Lake LDS Temple on April 9, 1964. Their marriage would bring four boys: Tim L (Lelaine), Tracy H (Kristin), D. Scott (Karen), and Todd G. Barlow who all survive her. She was the proud grandmother of nine grandchildren who she loved dearly

Nancy spent her growing up years in Verdland Park in Layton. She graduated from Davis High School in 1960. She worked with her mother at Sill’s Café in Layton and later would earn her beauticians license and work at Audrene’s. She followed her husband to Fort Bragg after their marriage where he served in the U.S. Army. Later, they returned to Utah where their first son was born. From 1970 to 1977 she lived in Santa Monica, CA which she grew to love, however she was grateful to return to Layton where she was closer to her family and friends. She enjoyed gardening, cooking, quilting, sewing, as well as making crafts, gifts, and awards to share.

Nancy was a devout member of the LDS Church and fulfilled many callings throughout her lifetime. She would spend nearly 17 years serving in the Young Women’s. Later in life she served in various callings in the Relief Society including twice serving as the Ward Relief Society President, two different Stake Relief Society Boards, Chorister, and as the Stake Relief Society President of the Layton Utah Stake. She also served as a Gospel Doctrine teacher.

She was a volunteer leader of the Boy Scouts of America for nearly 28 years. Among her many accomplishments, she assisted in the creation of the Silver Wolf training course and served on the first three courses. She would also receive her Woodbadge beads, the District Award of Merit, the James E. West award, Distinguished Commissioner, and the prestigious Silver Beaver award for her service. She was employed by Trapper Trails Council, BSA for 19 years retiring in October 2007. She enjoyed teaching boys values and skills that would last throughout their lifetime. She was especially proud of her four boys who all achieved the Eagle rank.

Nancy was beloved by all who knew her. Her friendly optimism and care for others was noted by many. She is survived by her two brothers, A. Scott Young and Ned B. (Christine) Young, two aunts, and many cousins. She is also survived by 32 nephews and nieces. She was preceded in death by her parents and other members of her extended family including two sisters-in-law and her father-in-law.

As a family, we thank the skilled doctors and staff at the Huntsman Cancer Institute, including Dr. Theresa Werner, Stephanie Kovack and Dr. Karen Zempolich who provided a great deal of loving support to her during these many months. We offer our gratitude as well to Sherry and the staff at South Davis Hospice for their loving care of mother during these last few weeks. We also thank all of our many friends and family for their kind notes and phone calls throughout her battle. We are grateful to each of you for your tender kindness towards our family.

Funeral services will be held on Thursday, May 29, 2008 at 11am at the Layton Utah Stake Center, 60 W. Gordon Ave., Layton. Friends and family are invited to meet with the family on Wednesday, May 28, 2008 from 6-8 in the evening at the Layton Lindquist Mortuary, 1867 N. Fairfield Road and the day of the funeral from 9-10:30 am at the Stake Center. Interment will be in the Layton Lindquist Memorial Park. Send condolences to the family at: www.lindquistmortuary.com

Seriously! could these two be any cuter? We had to have some photos taken because I am a lousy mom and it has been 3 years, yes 3, since we had some photos done. They want some current ones for the funeral and so we went this morning and I loved this picture.

Here are a few more we did:

Riding in Style

Well- She finally did it. She learned how to ride a two-wheeler. She has been working on it for a while and were not allowed to help her. Those who know her well, know she is a fairly independent little soul and she pretty much taught herself. (That is why it took a minute). I went and let her pick out a new bike once she got it down. She learned to ride on Hayden's old "boy" bike. I told her when she did it I would buy her a cute "girl" bike. So- here is a picture of the bike. Purple and Pink- can't get much more girly then that. I am very proud of her. She is learning at a very young age how to set a goal and work to reach it. She isn't always patient but neither am I and she's five. Today is her last day of preschool and you would think she was graduating from college. She is so excited. Her program is next Monday and she is ready. Kindergarten awaits.

P.S. make note of the helmet I am trying to be a good mommy, even though sometimes we protect our kids too much these day. Go be a KID!!!!

Morphine- Good!!!!

We went over to take Mother's Day Dinner to mom and dad Barlow's yesterday and it's amazing the difference 15 hours on morphine makes. She is a little slurred in her speech but she is awake and not hurting AT ALL!!. I knew morphine was good but I have never seen it make such a dramatic difference in a person's whole being. She feels a little lupey but she doesn't act lupey and all. I told her a little lupey is a small price to pay for the pain relief she is getting. In fact, it is a little weird to remember how sick she is because so able to talk and be there for everything. She can't walk or eat but we talked and talked for hours last night. The boys gave her blessing releasing her if it be the Lord's will and then she bore her testimony to us. What an amazing experience that was. By the end Traeden, Scott, and Hayden, ages 12, 9, 8, were all sobbing. They are old enough it understand what is happening and it was tender. Especially when the oldest, Traeden, went to hug her before they left. He sensed it was the last time he would probably see her and he was weeping. We all lost it again. She told each of the boys how proud she was of them and told them to be so grateful that their dad's could baptize them. Her dad was umpiring a baseball game when she was baptized and only she and her mom were there. It is a memory I hope they hold on to forever, I know I will.

Hospice

Tracy and I went over tonight and finally talked Mom and Dad into getting hospice help. They have been fighting it but she needs the help to manage her pain. We are having a family prayer tonight for the Lord to take her quickly if he is going to take her. Her pain is starting to be unbearable. Hopefully the Morphine can finally help. I sat on the bed with her tonight and finish her obituary. She kept asking me if I thought it was morbid that she was writing it. She is so worried about being morbid. I love her for that. She still looks beautiful. She is wearing make-up and her hair is done to the best of her ability and she doesn't complain. She is an incredible example to me. She keeps apologizing for mumbling through the pain. I told her if she apologized one more time I was going to smack her. Thanks to all of your for your kinds words. She is too young to die.

Mom Barlow

Mom Barlow is dying. We do not expect her to make it to June. Her body is beginning to shut down and the cancer to is making it impossible for her to eat or keep food down once she can eat it. She weighs 90 lbs. I feel like a horrible daughter because I cannot be around her without weeping. I can't really even have a conversation with her, it makes me so sad and I feel so guilty. I have been struggling a little as of late with a few issues in life and she called me the other day to see what she could do to help me. Talk about a wake up call to myself. My dying, sick mother wants to know what she can do for me.

She has asked Tracy to sing at her funeral. This is a hard thing to do in and of itself but then you add the fact that he is singing " I Often Go Walking" makes it even harder. We were trying to practice (at 11:30pm because it is the only time we are together in our house) and as we got to the second verse which goes "Oh Mother, I give you my love with each flower to give forth sweet fragrance a whole lifetime through" He completely lost it and so did I. We tried to pull it together and try again but we could not get through it. I am not sure what we are going to do. She wants him to sing it so bad. It was the first song he ever sang in church on Mother's Day when he was 7. If he were not a florist I don't think it would be this hard. Flowers mean a lot to him and his mom. The last line is "I learn how to love them, dear mother, from you." How are we doing to do this? I think through this experience I have come to learn what the "refiners's fire" is. Wish us luck- it is going to be a tough couple of weeks.

p.s. the picture is of her at Christmas, 40 lbs ago, in her wedding dress. She gave us her dress. It is so gorgeous!!

My Sister!!

I love my sister. It took us a few years to find our sister groove because of our age difference, but I know no one in this world has my back more than she does. So, in honor of her graduation today from college, I am going to list the 21 (her age) reason I love my sister:

1- She filled a hole in my life when I needed her the most.
2- She makes me laugh everytime I am with her.
3- She loves my kids as if they were her own.
4- My kids would rather be with her more than anyone (except maybe Grandma)
5- She wears hot pink and lime green shoes
6- We have the same red sexy phone
7- She will go and get me a drink when I am stuck at home with sleeping kids.
8- She will go and get me ice cream when I am depressed and stuck at home with sleeping kids.
9- She get's my husband (not everyone does)
10-She will drive down from Logan to come and play at rehearsals (ok the cute boys are probably the reason, but I pretend it is for me.
11-She graduated with a double major in 3 year- she is so cool.
12- She is just as big a slob as I am (though I confess to be a reformed slob)
13-She taught me what a wenis is- sorry if you don't know- is really is not perverted.
14- She drives a "peej"
15- She doesn't believe she is spoiled (refer to 14)
16- She is one of 5 interns for Senator Bennett this fall- how cool is she!!
17- She has opinions and freely shares them (this was hard for me at first, she is always supposed to be 12 and go along with what I think, right?)
18- She loves Moonlight as much as a do (which is really sad, it is so cheesy)
19- We are both closet tv-a-holics (sorry I just outed you)
20- When she is alone at home she sleeps with furniture against the door ( I don't blame her but I think it is so cute!!)
21- She completed our family and I don't know what we would do without her. I love you!!